Ugly Complexes

Complexes stop doing beautiful things in life

   On that Thursday night, my Grandfather was busy with a costume design for  ‘farmer’. My mother knew that her son’s talent is not good enough for any other competition except Fancy Dress. I rehearsed with the ‘Farmer’s costume four or five times at the veranda. In between mother was reminding me that you should turn one round at the stage otherwise ‘Indian tie’ couldn’t see. I agreed

     On the next day, I along with my brother & sister went to the school festival with our costumes. When we reached the school, I felt very shame on my Farmers’ outlook with the ‘Tie’.Oh, I can’t imagine to participate in front of my friends ..I told to them, No i’m not competing for fancy dress. They tried on me to get rid of my complexes..You would be on the stage hardly for one minute. Chechi njan illa...Competition will be afternoon, So we have a plenty of time..So .Later we can decide....

 Afternoon, I hided under one of the desks of my classroom. My brother and sister were looking for me all around the school...they couldn’t locate me...Competition resumed after the lunch break...I went to the school auditorium  and stood behind the stage...They called the participants by chest numbers... ‘Chest number 101, First call’....Curtain was raised, A ‘Farmer’ came to the stage...I surprised..”He looks like me”....My Brother!!...

I tried to wash the shame of that incident, But majority in my family have a good memory.

But Years after,

 A world of unskilled & Complexes; How we will survive!! 

                     I loved to be involved in a few adventures on the land and the sea, Not at the extend up to a professional. Recently I went to a Mall with my brother and cousin..We stepped up to the third floor, had a coffee. As we roaming aimlessly, stopped at a place where a good number of Keralites were laughing at some one...They even couldn’t control it...We moved towards them with a belief of some Comedy programs .From that balcony, we looked down..100’s of people were skating on the Ice. They  were laughing at the people who were falling on the Ice rink....There were a few Tamilians on the ice rinks...They even couldn’t make one step on the ice; even before they would fall down...(If we don’t smile at people who fall down, then we are not human...)So I decided to skate on the Ice...I told my interest to my brother and cousin. They were not at all interested... “ Da,Ariyavunna panikku poyaal porei”....I took a ticket from the counter and queued up for the skating shoes...I took some trials from outside of the rink. Tamilians who  came out from the rink wished for a ‘nice’ time inside.

                Shamelessly telling, I slipped on the ice at the first step itself. I tried several known techniques to stand up...But no way.... One among them in the rink stretched his hand. I felt the difficulty even to stand on the rink...Somehow i managed to stand but I couldn’t stop my swinging. I was moving like a pendulum..I was afraid of putting another step. But I thought ‘Already wet,then.....’Without much hesitation i put another step....Nothing more to say...I fell down again ;But fell down  differently  from the first...I understood I couldn’t stand up...So I lied there for a minute...An instructor came and gave a hand....I took a long breath while standing...without any shame I put another step...You know, How to fall down by hitting back on the ice...That was my third fall and understanding....Another instructor came near to me and told .Stand up by yourself...He told me to press your hands on the ice and move up...Again i tried to walk on the ice again..He gave me a tip, ‘Walk like a penguin’...I followed his words...After a few steps I fell down for the fourth time....I fell down with my two legs up in the air...like the hands of 10 past 10 wall clock... However I completed one round in the rink. ... Sometimes I hold on others Shoulders, or their shirts...

          My brother and cousin came near to the rink and asked me to come out...Da, this is shame  for us ,If you fall like this”...After one hour I came out from the rink...How many times did you fall there, we counted up to ten, then we stopped.... Da, you know all the spectators were laughing at you.....One of them told us “Avan, who is falling frequently is a Malayalee,100% sure”...So We hide the fact that you are my brother...He he..... 

But I know now, How differently a person can fall down and to Rise from the falls...!!

Ennu snehapoorvam

Subin

I felt the ice rink as a world...A world of weak. Most of them don’t know to how to ‘do’..

But ‘Together’, we finished the ‘skating’

You know, which is the word we often call at the time of helplessness!!!!